Post Natal Depression Week Post Series

POST #1- A working woman of the 1950s, Sarah Brooker's ambition is challenged by the traditional path of marriage and children. In this chapter, her career plans as a Nursing Sister become uncertain with the discovery of her first pregnancy. 

 ‘Mrs. Brooker?’ Dr Webster appeared from the hall. ‘How are you this morning?’

‘Well, thank you, Doctor.’

Sarah followed him to his office, sitting down opposite his desk. He reclined in his large leather chair, picking up a piece of paper.

‘Well, Mrs. Brooker, I have some good news for you. You’re pregnant!’

Sarah eyes widened. ‘I am?’ 

‘Congratulations. I bet you can’t wait to tell Jack.’ 

‘Oh, yes,’ Sarah nodded.

‘That’s wonderful. He’s going to be thrilled.’

Dr Webster removed his glasses. ‘Mrs. Brooker, I thought you’d be a little more excited. You’re having a baby!’

‘I am excited, Doctor,’ Sarah assured. ‘I am, of course. I’m just a little surprised, that’s all. This has all happened very quickly. Jack and I have only been married three months.’

Dr. Webster nodded. ‘That is completely normal, Mrs. Brooker. Couples like you and Jack get married and have children all the time. That’s how it goes.’

      As the bus bumped along toward home, Sarah gazed out the window. She was going to be a mother. She had emerged from six years of dedicated study and an even longer-standing ambition, and started her career barely a year ago.

            Sarah folded cloth napkins and arranged them at both places at the dining table. She looked down at one of the china plates, withholding the napkin a moment as she looked at her reflection.

Look at me, she thought. I am in an apron doing housework. Just like my mother.

The church congregation showered the couple with congratulations, but behind her smile, panic slowly simmered within Sarah.

Everything is happening so fast, she thought. Within a year I’ve gotten married and fallen pregnant. My life is out of my control. It’s not the way I wanted it.

‘Oh, Sarah, I can’t believe you’re starting a family,’ Amelia Mason exclaimed.

‘Oh, yes,’ Sarah responded, snapping out of her thoughts. ‘So, you’ll be leaving work soon?’ asked Bettie Hanson. ‘Well, yes, but I will be going back once I’ve had the baby,’ she replied surely.

            Her first visit to Dr Webster three months earlier had resulted in a prescription for the contraceptive pill, a measure she had taken so this very thing wouldn’t happen yet. Over the coming weeks, sadness festered within her hesitancy; she’d always envisioned her first pregnancy would be filled with joy, but that elation had slipped by her. The timing was terrible in her overall plan.

She continued to work for as long as she was permitted. Walking away from the hospital, she knew it would be a good year or more before she could return. With her first baby she carried

disappointment, yet in her private despair Sarah pledged to herself that she’d make her situation work. She accepted the little being growing inside her and slipped into her new homebound routine, having devised a new plan.